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DNA Repatterning

I have a very sensible friend who does not believe in all things spiritual, but for a few years we went to a retreat, health farm or spiritual centre over my birthday in August. This year we booked to go to a centre in Glastonbury. My friend had researched what was on offer and had decided (quite unlike her i think) that we would have DNA repatterning.

When we arrived after a long drive and asked what had been arranged for us, the leader of the centre said ‘oh i thought you would like to go out to dinner on your birthday’. Pointing out that since I go out to dinner a lot this would not make my birthday very special I asked what treatments might be available that afternoon and evening.

About an hour later she said that she could do the DNA repatterning and we agreed to that.  Since it was my birthday i went first and was shown into a room with a couch and was asked to lie down. The woman then says that she is putting a CD on from her friend Rosemary whose voice was a bit ‘plummy’. She then left the room.

To me the CD was a standard meditation spoken in a Californian accept that mentioned DNA repatterning (don’t ask!) a few times. At the end of the CD the woman comes back in to the room and looks into my eyes and says ‘see that has worked’. That was £40.

When I came out my friend asked me what it was like and I said ‘I dunno see what you think’. When my friend comes out she describes the same experience with the single difference that during her session the CD stuck. So she did not know whether to get up and sort the CD out or leave it to judder. She left it to judder and of course was concerned about what was happening to her DNA whilst the CD was playing up.

When the woman came back into the room my friend described what had happened and without missing a beat she looked into her and eyes and said ‘never mind it has worked’. That would be another £40.

We did consider reporting this woman to the Trading Standards department but could just imagine what they would say and think about us as we recounted the story.

‘So let me get this straight, you were prepared to pay £40 to have your DNA repatterned is that right?’

I think you can see why  we never bothered.     

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