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Teamwork Love- the Evolution of Love

Coming back to where we started that marriage is a gamble ‘by two people who don’t yet know who they are or who the other might be’. For a relationship to succeed and evolve both parties need to take responsibility for their own happiness and address their own needs for development. This involves learning to accept themselves but also learning to accept the other as they are. You can’t expect them to change. If the partner chooses to change, that is a bonus and this joint development will allow them to move forward together. Continue reading

A Sceptical View of Romantic Love -Romantic Love – The Evolution of Love

Foley suggests that after the dream wedding, the problems that were suppressed during the illusion of romantic love return, observing that ‘no one is easy to live with’, there are only ‘degrees of difficulty’. He strikes a chord when he says that instead of being encrusted with diamonds we are all a bundle ‘of irritating beliefs, habits, superstitions, neuroses, moods, ailments, indulgences and bad taste not to mention appalling relatives and inexplicable friends.’ Continue reading

The Rise and Fall of Romantic Love – Romantic Love – The Evolution of Love

I believe that this life cycle of falling in love and falling out of it will feel familiar to most of us. In his reactions you see how his own insecurities heighten his positive feelings and deepen his negative feelings. He finishes the book by talking about ‘Love Lessons’ and concludes that although romantic love is painful, full of jealousy, masochism and obsession that it is preferable to the painless, pleasant, peaceful and reciprocated feelings of mature love. Continue reading

The Psychic and His Russian Girlfriend – Impoverished Love – The Evolution of Love

The Psychic and His Russian Girlfriend I was in a meeting where a psychic (who looked remarkable like Uriah Heep the obsequious and ‘ever so umble’ clerk from Dicken’s David Copperfield) was giving a talk. He started his lecture by saying he was going to talk about ‘Trust’. He then proceeded to tell us that … Continue reading

Internet Dating Scams – Impoverished Love – The Evolution of Love

Internet Dating Scams The last aspect of impoverished love that I would like to talk about is the world of internet dating scams. When I first started internet dating I talked to someone who looked really handsome in his profile picture.  He said he was Portuguese and worked in the diamond industry and lived in … Continue reading

The Nature of Obsession – Impoverished Love – The Evolution of Love

The Nature of Obsession When talking about impoverished love I also wanted to mention the nature of obsession. Having been obsessed myself on quite a few occasions and for quite a length of time, I mentioned this to my female friends and much to my surprise I found that obsession has often been part of … Continue reading

The Rise of Porn – Impoverished Love – The Evolution of Love

The Rise of Porn – Impoverished Love       When I was younger pornographic magazines, used to be available on the top shelf of dodgy newsagents and I was not really aware of it as I was growing up. Now we live in an age when porn, rightly or wrongly is readily and freely … Continue reading

The Rise of Fun – Impoverished Love – the Evolution of love

The Rise of ‘Fun’ Another form of impoverished love is what I would call ‘the rise of fun.’ I included it in the section on impoverished love because it describes behaviour which is impoverished – but it’s not love at all and makes no real pretence at love. After talking to many men on the … Continue reading

Impoverished Relationships – The Evolution of love

This level of ‘love’ is characterised by a lack of discrimination in chosen partners. The worst examples of this behaviour can be seen on shows like Jeremy Kyle or Jerry Springer. When people go on these shows they have often met through social media, got pregnant within weeks or even days of meeting, switch partners when they are on ‘a break’, which might just be overnight, and seem to enjoy the attention they get from arguing about their partner and the relationship on national television.

What fascinates me about this type of relationship is that when warring couples are asked why they are still together often whilst being held back by the security staff, they say ‘ but we love each other’. This is because they are used to an impoverished template of love. Continue reading

The Continuum Of Love – The Evolution of Love

Having read many books on relationships I realised that much of the information was conflicting and much of the advice was manipulative. Then I hit on the idea that the reason that the advice was conflicting is that they were talking about different types of relationships Once I realised this, I used the idea of … Continue reading