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This tag is associated with 18 posts

REMOVE THE BLOCKS IN YOUR LIFE AND SUCCEED

Now all the exercise videos and New Year’s resolutions are out of the way and the diet is a long distant memory. You might feel frustrated that another year has gone past and you still haven’t changed your job, moved house, found a partner or taken the plunge back into education. If you don’t want to be sitting here the same time next having the same thoughts, you must take some action to remove some of the blocks that may stand in your way and make 2017 the year that you succeed. Continue reading

Open the door to influence

As an executive coach, for the past 12 years I have been assisting clients to get different outcomes by using a very predictable and successful stage-by-stage model. I have called this approach ‘The cycle of influence’. After learning these skills people often achieve immediate results, after trying unsuccessfully to get things done for them by … Continue reading

Attachment Theory – The Evolution of Love

To be securely attached you would have experienced all or most of the following ingredients in your childhood:-

You would have been raised by people who you knew loved you and were prepared to express and demonstrate this, they would have always been there for you, established clear boundaries to help you feel safe, helped you to adopt a clear set of values, taken time to listen to and helped you to interpret your feelings, thoughts and ideas, encouraged you in all your interests, validated your emotions and assisted you in your emotional development. They would have helped you to be the best you could be, celebrated your achievements, accepted your weaknesses, encouraged you to be empathetic with others, given you constructive feedback when they thought it would help you and taught you to give constructive feedback when you were unhappy about someone else’s behaviour. They would have allowed you to depend on them when you were young and celebrated your independence when you were ready. Finally they would have modelled a successful and loving relationship with a partner. Continue reading

The Psychological Bingo Board and Relationships -The Evolution of Love

In my previous blog I talked about a concept called the Psychological Bingo Board and explained how we in effect programme our personality based on the behaviours and beliefs which enable us to get attention when we are growing up. The idea behind the Psychological Bingo Board is that we have within us potentially all … Continue reading

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY – The Evolution of Love

According to Allan and Barbara Pease*, there are four basic things that men have always wanted from women Sex    Basic Services, food, washing, mothering etc To be loved and to be number one Solitary time without interruption Whereas they suggest that women say that want the following from men Love Faithfulness Kindness Commitment Education and … Continue reading

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth…..- The Evolution of Love

A publisher once said to me that women buy self-help books and share them with their men. Although I am sure this is generally true, men do buy and read books like the international best seller ‘The Game’ and ‘Rules of the Game’ by Neil Strauss in which he tells the (AFC) Average Frustrated Chump … Continue reading

Men – Changing the face of relationships – The Evolution of Love

Adding to this commentary of male identity, Allan and Barbara Pease say in their book ‘The Mating Game – Why Men Want Sex and Women need love’, that men these days have few male role models especially amongst teachers ‘It all adds to the confusion new generations of young men feel when thinking about what … Continue reading

Relationships – three main conclusions – The Evolution of Love

After researching paired relationships for over 10 years I came to three main conclusions. That we all have a drive towards completion, which influences our choice of partner and the experiences we attract towards us. That the relationships you will have are a factor of your own personal development, so if you want a better … Continue reading

Why should you join the People Skills Revolution?

Do you want to have more power? Do you want to have more influence with other people? Do you want have more control of your life? Do you want to achieve some goals that you never before thought possible? Well today I am going to tell you how to achieve all of those goals if … Continue reading

Why Building Rapport is SO Important

Under normal circumstances, when you want to make a request for someone to do something for you and you get on well with them, you tend to have a chat with them before you ask them for what you want. Then your request flows naturally out of your conversation with them. With people you do … Continue reading